Melba Moore- Keeping My Lover Satisfied (1983)

My single friends often ask me the secret to a happy long-term relationship, and the advice is simple: sometimes, the most important thing is to keep your damn mouth shut.

Jeanette "Lady" Day- Come Let Me Love You (1981)

Sometimes I'm standing at the cashier, and they're having difficulty with ringing something through, and in my head, I'm wishing they would just let me back there to help them figure it out, but at the same time, I know in my heart I'd also try to rip off some till tape and the cashier's Chapstick and cigarettes, so I guess it's probably for the better that they keep me on the other side of the counter after all.

Aura- Checking You Out (1981)

If you're out on the town, and somebody keeps glancing in your direction, then you need to run to the bathroom and decipher if they were genuinely checking you out, or just mentally trying to remove some crud from your beard.

Conversion- Sweet Thing (1982)

Last night, I watched a dude, right in the middle of a UFC-fueled bro-down, request that his friends grab him a drink at the bar. He specified loudly his aversion to sweet drinks. Anything but sweet drinks. Too girly. He is heterosexual, thankyouverymuch. His friends returned with a glass of bourbon. A man drink, he says, while he downs the sickly sweet liquid. Near the end of the glass, he puts his arms around two of his friends. I love you guys so much, he whispered closely into one of their ears.

Rashawn- You're The One (1985)

The one sure thing in my entire life, the only sure thing in my entire life -past, present, and future- is repetitive, uninspired, and melodramatic Lohan arrests on the reg.