Gap Band- Outstanding (1982)

I've been considering a little social experiment. I'm going to go into Gap, and put on the biggest, ugliest jeans and see if the sales person still tells me I look "outstanding". I can't shake this feeling that their opinions are less valid than they would have you believe.

Fonda Rae- Over Like A Fat Rat (1982)

Years ago, I lived in Victoria, and would pass by the same homeless girl on the way to work every day. She would be slumped over, her dreadlocks and Cowichan sweater entwined with one another in a mass of fuzz and dirt. Her only friend, a rat that lived in a bucket, was kept beside her at all times. I used to smile to myself as I strolled past- firstly for the irony (what are the odds that a dirty rat and a dirty hippie would find each other in this crazy world and become BFFs?), but mostly for the sitcom potential.

Jupiter Band- Sarah Love (1987)

I love you guys, too!

Shakatak- Watching You (1985)

Oh, you're watching me too? I see. Perhaps it's time to stop handing out my address on ChatRoulette.

Venna- Watching You (1983)

You've been watching me? I see. I guess you probably saw when I spit soup all over the place because my mouth was too frozen to eat because I hadn't been to the dentist since I was taken off my mom's benefit plan when I was nineteen...
Hopefully you were taking a bathroom break when that happened.