Monday, November 25, 2013

Pino D'angio- Okay Okay (1981)

Sometimes I think that my years and years of sunbathing put me at a pretty terrible risk for developing skin cancer, but then I look at Dog The Bounty Hunter's leathery hide and think, hey, if this guy's still okay, then I probably have very little to worry about.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Can-Dee- Lucky Day (1984)

Years ago, I almost burned down my entire apartment building making nachos, then, when eating a fresh batch of nachos that I made immediately afterward, I almost choked to death, and people still say that there is no such thing as luck.

Friday, November 8, 2013

High Fashion- Hold On (1982)

Lesson of the day: anything can look high-fashion if you wear enough eyeliner.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Slave- Bad Girl (1983)

I think the world might be telling me something when, probably 80% of the time, I type 'Satan' instead of 'Sarah'. I used to think it was just poor placement of keys, but lately I'm not so sure.

Monday, October 28, 2013

Kevin McCord- Never Say (1985)

If you're wondering when you should divulge your love of beef jerky to a new friend, the answer should be "never".

Saturday, October 19, 2013

George Duke- Shine (1982)

I have been working for years on a simple mathematical formula that equates shininess to deliciousness when eyeballing the endless crap-shoot of a Chinese buffet.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Samson & Delilah- I Can Feel Your Love Slippin Away (1984)

I used to think that I did far too many wild things when I was a kid, but as I watch my youth slip away, I can't help but wonder why teens don't do more stupid things while they have the balls to get away with it.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

The Crown Heights Affair - Dreaming a Dream (1975)

You know, maybe it's all the heavy sleeping medication that I take, but I would just love to have one dream that didn't involve me butchering my own hair, having my clothes fall off in a public place, or letting someone gross stick their hands down my pants. Just. One.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Change- Paradise (1981)

I often wonder if I should change my 'Thug Life' tattoo to 'Hug Life', because it's a great way to trick people into giving me physical affection.

Monday, September 23, 2013

Donna Summer- If It Hurts Just A Little (1982)

If it hurts just a little, then whoa, you're totally doing it wrong.