Central Line- Walking Into Sunshine (Larry Levan Mix) (1981)

When I step out onto my porch, and the beautiful, bright morning sun hits my face and warms my skin, I just know that I'm going to spend the entire day at work telling kids to put their damn shirts back on. I'm not sure the chemistry behind the process, but no matter how cold outside, street kids seem to have a biological need to bare their nipples at the first hint of sunlight. Fact.

Gap Band- Early In The Morning (1982)

When most people say that they are not "morning people", it is implied that they are total outward dicks in the early hours. I, too, am not a fan of mornings, but instead of being a grouchy asshole, I remain sweet and pleasant while calmly, silently plotting the demise of you and everyone around you until noon-ish or two coffees, whatever comes first.

Karen Young- Hot Shot (1978)

If you are really, really good at something, don't brag and show off and be a dick about it.
That is, unless that particular thing is something super difficult like french braiding your own hair, or learning all of the words to a Twista song. In that case, g'ahead hot shot... You earned that shit.

Gary's Gang- Runaway (Dub Mix) (1984)

There is not much more of a humbling experience than slinking home a half an hour after telling your parents you were running away forever, because you forgot your Tiger Beats, and dinner might be kind-of good tonight.

Melba Moore- Keeping My Lover Satisfied (1983)

My single friends often ask me the secret to a happy long-term relationship, and the advice is simple: sometimes, the most important thing is to keep your damn mouth shut.

Jeanette "Lady" Day- Come Let Me Love You (1981)

Sometimes I'm standing at the cashier, and they're having difficulty with ringing something through, and in my head, I'm wishing they would just let me back there to help them figure it out, but at the same time, I know in my heart I'd also try to rip off some till tape and the cashier's Chapstick and cigarettes, so I guess it's probably for the better that they keep me on the other side of the counter after all.

Aura- Checking You Out (1981)

If you're out on the town, and somebody keeps glancing in your direction, then you need to run to the bathroom and decipher if they were genuinely checking you out, or just mentally trying to remove some crud from your beard.

Conversion- Sweet Thing (1982)

Last night, I watched a dude, right in the middle of a UFC-fueled bro-down, request that his friends grab him a drink at the bar. He specified loudly his aversion to sweet drinks. Anything but sweet drinks. Too girly. He is heterosexual, thankyouverymuch. His friends returned with a glass of bourbon. A man drink, he says, while he downs the sickly sweet liquid. Near the end of the glass, he puts his arms around two of his friends. I love you guys so much, he whispered closely into one of their ears.

Rashawn- You're The One (1985)

The one sure thing in my entire life, the only sure thing in my entire life -past, present, and future- is repetitive, uninspired, and melodramatic Lohan arrests on the reg.

TFO- Friend Of Mine (1986)

In order to be a friend of mine, you need to have a great record collection, a love of fine dining and the 5-cent candy bins at 7-11, a beautiful smile, and an unusually high tolerance for bullshit.